Oh Sister Josephine, what do all this policemen mean,
by coming to the convent in their grim limosines,
after Sister Josephine.
While you, Sister Josephine, sit with your boots up on the altar screen,
you smoke one last cigar,
what a funny nun you are.
The policeman says that Josephine's a burglar in disguise,
Big Fat Norman 15 years on the run,
the sisters can't believe it, no that can't be Josephine,
just think of all her tenderness to all the younger nuns.
Oh Sister Josephine, they're searching the chapel where you've been seen
the nooks and the crannies of the nun's canteen
after Sister Josephine.
While you, Sister Josephine, take a farewell swig of Benedictine
before your "Au-Revoir"
what a funny nun you are.
Admittedly her hands are big and hairy
and emblazoned with a curious tattoo,
admittedly her voice is on the deep side
and she seems to shave more often than the other sisters do.
Oh Sister Josephine, founder of the convent Sumo team,
they're leaving through your volumes of those danish magazines
after Sister Josephine.
While you, Sister Josephine, give a farewell whiff of Benzedrine
to the convent's budgerigar
a bloody funny nun you are!
No more will her snores echo through chapel during prayers
or her lusty moaning stir the stilly night
no more empty bottles of altar wine come clanking from her cell,
no longer will the cloister toilet seat stand upright....
Oh Sister Josephine, slipping through their fingers like margarine,
dressed only in your Y-fronts and a rosary,
what a funny nun you seem to be!